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Artists are people driven by the tension between the desire to communicate and the desire to hide.

Donald Winnicott  (via themajorreview)

the struggle.

(Source: ronakeller, via noldarling)

euo:

Jenny Holzer

"In a dreamYou saw a way to surviveAnd you were full of joy.”

euo:

Jenny Holzer

"In a dream
You saw a way to survive
And you were full of joy.”

getting closerrr

getting closerrr

A lot of the people I follow on Twitter have been tweeting about finding ways to “walk in your purpose.” They are people who self-published or started non-profits or are otherwise creating avenues for themselves and I feel accusations in their advice. “Why don’t you have a mentor? Why aren’t you living your dream?” It pushes me toward justifications for why I am where I am instead of inspiring me to search for a mentor or find ways of doing what I care about. I’ve been having a really strong reaction to it lately, which could be fear. I don’t know what that world is about, mentors and titles and creating something substantial according to your own vision (even if that thing is just your own life).

I’ve described my life as developing like a weed and I am ashamed of tending it in such a lackadaisical way. I’ve put a lot of effort into directing and nourishing my spirit, yes, but outer life…at some point I must’ve decided that it just wasn’t something that could ever reflect what’s really meaningful to me and so I didn’t try. Pessoa advocated having a double-self and that has been the case for me, having this outer life that is passable but not impressive and an inner life that is thoughtfully seeded and culled and curated.  In life in general, I haven’t been moved to show signs of what goes on inside of me.  I share with a small network of people and that has sustained me. It has been hard to face the very real possibility that I can’t have the kind of meaningful life I really want unless I put much more effort into the outer life I’ve largely abandoned. It is not enough to have bright and fragrant life happening in the basement somewhere, it has to show even up on the surface. I thought the surface was a shallow place and certainly, it can be, but not always. It is substantive if you are. And its value isn’t dependent on what every single person on the outside perceives but there will definitely be an influential few so why not let them see something that matters to you? Something reflective of who you are? It is such a struggle for me because that is not how I have functioned in life thus far but I will have to grow beyond those things I usually do. Heaven help.

"This so-called universe appears as a juggling, a picture show. To be happy look upon it so."

got my hair cut! it’s so soft now. I’m here for it.

got my hair cut! it’s so soft now. I’m here for it.

I really wish the natural hair community would move away from this obsession with length/the orientation of considering a natural hair journey a “success” once your hair hits the middle of your back or beyond.

Like. Forget about proving the critics in our head wrong about black women not being able to grow long hair. Can we exist outside of that gaze for a minute and think about what is most aesthetically appealing to us? (Without the imposed ideals that equate femininity with long hair. We know where those come from).  Can we just think about what looks good on us individually?  Which maintenance routine works best for our lifestyle or whether we are really interested in spending half a day washing and detangling our hair?

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flora-file:

Euphorbia flowers (by flora-file)

that bright new green! I miss it. where is it??

(via delightexciteengageinspire)

Im here to co pilot in the journey

Peasus take the wheel.